Archive | June, 2013

Paddling Out – Miike Snow

30 Jun

I sort of like the “song of the day” type bit that I’ve been trying to get going. Maybe I’ll make it a thing.


Surprise – MTV Gives Awful Advice

30 Jun

Anyone in the sphere of social justice blogging is probably aware of MTV’s “Guy Code”, a general shitshow of patriarchal machismo that’s more likely to get a dude slapped in the face than laid. But recently, MTV decided to air a different sort of shitshow they call “Girl Code.” You know, as not to be sexist.

girl code

Before I start complaining, let me just say that a positive aspect of Girl Code is that they feature women of different races and sizes. I mean, they all say problematic stuff, but it’s nice to see women on TV who you can tell apart. Also, they talked about female masturbation which is a pretty unusual thing to hear about on TV. At least I smiled before I barfed everywhere.

masturbation pizza

Another positive thing is that MTV’s video player lets you skip right to the parts you wanted to complain the most about. I feel like they saved me a couple of brain cells. I’d be here all day if I discussed every problematic aspect, so I’ll just give you some of the examples I found especially nauseating.

First off, for a show that promotes “sisterhood” there is (surprise) an awful lot of slut-shaming. To be “classy” you can’t wear six inch heels or tight clothes, and can only swear when you’re watching sports. You also can’t smoke, and if you do, you can’t pack your cigarettes. Because apparently it’s “masculine” to not want tobacco all over your other belongings. While smoking is unarguably bad for you, the fact that a few people on MTV dub it unsexy is hardly a reason to quit.

In order to represent the male point of view, MTV appointed Guy Code sleazebag Andrew Shulz who came out with these gems:

shulz hook

There go my panties, bruh

“If a guy is all over you in public, that is a complete compliment” (this needs no comment)

(in reference to wanting to break up with a girl) “I’ll never be honest”

That’s right, ladies! We aren’t the only ones who are emotionally manipulative relationship terrorists! It’s totally okay if men drop hints and expect us to pick up on their innermost feelings. Right. Talking things out like an adult is overrated.

Girl Code cited these as hard and fast signs that your boyfriend wants to break up with you:

  • becoming emotionally withdrawn
  • hanging out with female friends (who have bigger boobs than you!)
  • neglecting you

breakup threat

Is that a challenge?

Now this is where I really start to get rustled. People who think that relationship problems are the only thing that could be bothering your significant other are completely misguided and selfish. Why not talk to your dude to find out why he’s withdrawn? Maybe he’s having problems at work or with school. Maybe he’s like me and gets bouts of depression where he doesn’t want to leave the house or do anything more complicated than make cereal. Perhaps his large-breasted female friends are to him what your friends are to you, people to hang out with so you and your SO can have separate lives. Maybe they’re neglecting you because they have other stuff to do. They just assume all women should be put on pedestals and constantly groomed by their (always male) significant others, and that dishonesty is excusable if it’s used to preserve feelings. I mean, if my boyfriend doesn’t text me for a couple of hours, I don’t automatically assume he’s hanging out with big boobed biddies (say that three times fast), because 9 times out of 10, he’s at work or studying.

jealousy women

Oooooh yeah girl, shake dat internalized misogyny

Anyway, MTV had a pretty good opportunity to talk about sexual fluidity and healthy experimentation when they addressed bisexuality. Unsurprisingly, they talked about bar hookups. For dudes’ pleasure. I’m still cleaning out the barf stains from my parents’ couch, they aren’t happy.


Solidarity for the 10%

There was also a bit about “acting crazy” and being jealous and how unattractive it is. I don’t go crazy because I’m a woman, I do it because I’m a high strung, New York Italian with a diagnosed anxiety disorder. Call me crazy. I dare you.

Now if it were just MTV harping on about this shit, I wouldn’t care much. But the thing is, a lot of women in my age bracket watch this and think it’s legitimately how you should act. I’m beating a dead horse by saying that MTV is awful, but when you see this stuff play out, you can tell it’s really just detrimental to becoming a functional adult and learning how relationships and sexuality are supposed to work.

Why I’m Not at NYC Pride

30 Jun

As an aggressively queer chick from the greater NYC area, you may be wondering why I’m shut in at Starbucks today instead of partying at one of the biggest pride festivals in the world.

Now I don’t have an issue with pride in and of itself. I “get” it, I have a rainbow bumper sticker, and I recently bought a rainbow flag to hang in the house I’ll be moving into. I understand the need to have pride in your sexuality, but I don’t feel any sort of obligation to the “queer community” as a whole. Maybe because people who claim to be so open love to pick on me for being bisexual and dating men, maybe because I’m a grumpy asshole. I don’t know. Pride events make me feel sort of weird, like I’m betraying my sour journalistic instincts. Plus, the straight women who go to gawk at gay men in tight shorts sort of make my stomach churn.

Being the grumpy cat that I am, I prefer to discuss hard-hitting queer issues without the rainbow veneer. Plus, NYC traffic and trains are a nightmare to begin with, so the last thing I need to do is day-drink and be stuck in a rainbow commuter hodgepodge.

It’s currently raining, and for the sake of all of you at the parade, I hope it lets up.

Happy pride though! This is probably the best time to be gay in America, and y’all have every right to celebrate. But I’ll be here, blogging.


Jesus of Suburbia – Green Day

28 Jun

Get in the time machine, kids!

Revelations in Counterculture – The Myspace Era

28 Jun

Like many other kids, I had my middle school “emo” phase. Recently I decided to take a time machine back to 2006, made a Taking Back Sunday Pandora station, and whined along with Adam Lazzara once again. Unfortunately, I deleted my old MySpace account, probably because my parents forced me to, but for our purposes, I’ll say it was because I was ashamed of my bad haircut and even worse makeup skills.


(this isn’t mine – but you get the gist)

Anyway, the 60s had their hippies, and the 2000s had emo kids. I’m sure when I was in middle school, I cared about its subcategories (scene, goth, etc) but for our purposes, they’re emo kids. With the ubiquity of the Internet combined with the attention-whoring mindset of many adolescent MySpace users, “emo” can hardly be called “counterculture.” They were (and maybe still are) bonded by a sense of disillusionment and a hatred of the mainstream society that they, like most counterculture movements, eventually would seep into. It should be a no-brainer that emo stemmed from the post-9/11 fear and disillusionment that all of the United States went through.

Green Day’s American Idiot blew up, I remember buying American Idiot merchandise in goddamn Claire’s. After the Bush-bashing first track, Billie Joe, in his typical nasally fashion, tells the story of characters who are completely damaged by the world around them. Just watch the Jesus of Suburbia video, because make fun of those guys all you want, but they nailed it.

american idiot

“Everyone is so full of shit

Born and raised by hypocrites

Hearts recycled but never saved

From the cradle to the grave”

The world suddenly became a terrifying place in the mid 2000s. Even kids who weren’t from New York like me sensed it. MySpace gave everyone a place to congregate and share their disillusionment through badly applied eyeliner, and poorly written poems about sadness. The raw anger and fuckall attitude of punk gave way to the fear and sadness of emo, which this album perfectly solidifies.

Who could turn down a writing job for $5?

28 Jun

Help out a starving college student here:

I’ll edit, proofread, write copy, do a dance, whatever!

Slash Shipping and Mad Men (spoilers)

25 Jun

Before I run the risk of sounding like a twelve year old girl on Tumblr, let me just say that I usually have a certain disdain for girls who have an obsession with slash shipping. I’ve encountered some of the more rabid Supernatural fans in my Tumblr days, and believe me, it’s pretty cringeworthy. However after watching season 6 of Mad Men, I’ve been finding that my OTP has shifted from Roger and Joan to Pete and Bob.


I tend to not buy the theories flying around Reddit about Bob Benson being the nega-Don, or a secret FBI agent. But part of Mad Men’s appeal is that they deal with social issues of the 1960s, and while Bob probably isn’t on the run from the law, a bunch of things about both him and Pete lead me to believe that we’re gonna see some steamy dude on dude action in season 7:

  • We really don’t know about Bob’s past. Maybe he had the identity shift and abrupt move to New York because his relationship with another man was found out?
  • Pete’s sexual relationship with Trudy is never really discussed. It’s a pretty solid guess that it became nonexistent or extremely unpleasant considering their separation.
  • It’s fairly well-known that closeted queer people can sometimes be overtly homophobic to cover up insecurities about their sexuality. Pete completely flipped his shit when Bob touched his knee. His knee. 
  • The only other time we’ve seen anything remotely having to do with gay issues was Joan’s lesbian roommate (who, much to my dismay, never came back). Let’s face it though, who wouldn’t have a crush on Joan? Oh right, Bob supposedly doesn’t. If this were real life, I’d roll my eyes at the “gay best friend” trope, but this is TV, and it makes sense. Also, the thing with Sal, who I’m pretty disappointed never came back.
  • Keeping up with Mad Men’s ability to weave historical events in with the characters’ stories, the Stonewall Riots took place in 1969, which marked the beginning of the mainstream queer movement. Season 7 will also take place in 1969. While it’s too much to ask to see Pete and/or Bob throwing bricks at cops, Greenwich Village is a relatively short subway ride from SC&P…
  • Whenever Pete and Bob fight, I just want smush their faces together and say NOW KISS.

Maybe this is some wishful thinking on my part, being that I’d love to see more non-stereotypical queer characters in TV, but as my hopes for a Roger/Joan reunion fade, I’m hoping my new OTP becomes canon.


Diane Young – Vampire Weekend

23 Jun

I’ve been jamming out to this uncontrollably for the past few days.


Towson White Student Union’s Blog

23 Jun

Towson White Student Union’s Blog

Does the KKK have this organized of a blog? Didn’t think so. College students are just so enlightened.

White Supremacy is All Kinds of Stupid

23 Jun

I’m making it my goal this summer to learn as much as possible without leaving my bed. This, of course, means that by the time I move back on campus, I’ll ideally have watched every second of video that Vice has to offer.

A couple of weeks ago, I watched their White Student Union and Triple Hate documentaries back to back. You can recreate my idea of a fun Friday night here:

Or you can just take my word for it. I don’t think it’s any secret that racists tend to be quite stupid. Then again, I’m currently re-watching a documentary on the KKK in a crowded Starbucks, so that may not be a smart  move either. At least I’m facing the window. Let me just make a quick disclaimer that although I have quite the background in social politics, being a white suburbanite, I have little authority on the heavier racial matters.


The Towson University White Student Union may have a better PR campaign than the KKK (Matthew Heimbach admits that you won’t get anywhere in America waving a swastika banner – I guess the racist connotations of a confederate flag are slightly more digestible in his book) but there are some striking similarities between a seemingly innocuous group of self-righteous college students, and the goddamn Ku Klux Klan that can’t be ignored.

  • Heimbach claims that he’s looking to “celebrate European heritage” on the organization’s blogspot. The KKK claims that they want to stay amongst their own people.
  • The total disregard for racial politics, and total disregard for black opinions of both organizations is apparent. As a white girl, I tend to take black people’s word for what’s racist and what isn’t because, you know, I don’t face racism and they do. Common sense, y’all.
  • White supremacists tend to think that black organizations are out to get them. Once again, total disregard for structural inequality and oppression patterns. My social justice-rooted political background is showing, and it’s angry.
  • The backlash against them is more or less the same.
  • The WSU’s search for “black predators” sounds awfully similar to the KKK’s talk of the “black political machine.” Both of these sound like metal bands.
  • Heimbach’s “THE SOUTH WILL RISE AGAIN” sticker on his laptop. Side note: identitarianism, are you joking me?
  • The loud guy in the red KKK robe says stuff about the “white people fightin’ fer ya!” and the WSU kids seem to think they’re doing the same thing. You know, by fighting black crime. At a mostly white university. Right.
  • Then again, at least the KKK knows they’re racist. Heimbach called the Black Student Union members his “brothers” at one point. I snorted.
  • Side note, that girl Addy is quite attractive. Shame she’s a white supremacist.
  • I snorted again when Heimbach asked the black dude why there wasn’t an NAACP for white people. His response was flawless. I won’t spoil it for you. The KKK also seems to think they’re a counter to the NAACP.

I’m sure there’s more, and if you’re willing to start a rousing discussion on the pitfalls of white supremacy with me, leave some in the comments. I really don’t have much else going on.